Plastic Dream Santa and other Christmas Stories

Look at all of the shit! Wow. Plastic - leaden or otherwise, better known as the prime export of The Great Chinese Republic. Americans demand it, and the Chinese have answered their calling. It seems to be their final calling. Stop. Think for a moment. Think about the piles of shit that you have. Would you have purchased it all if it wasn't so cheap? If your answer is no, then goddamn, you might as well consume. "Consume the world Jesse, consume to infinity." Jesse doesn't need to be told, as he is programmed to consume. Garden ornaments, extra storage containers for sand etc., a pliable waterproof sheet, a sofa-sleeper (red), a mysterious jelly-like probe, a ball of the stuff that has no apparent utility, a nice new doll toy for Sara. It's all there for the taking. Ripe if you will even. As the holiday season falls upon us heavily, take a time out, buy some shit. You will be pleased. The dollar is worth 6.83 Yuan. The ratio is dropping fast. Make your purchases soon.