Realistic Eye Damage
Of course, it's much more horrific than the falsified variety. However, neither is funny.
I realize that a good portion of you have counted my ticker out... left me for dead near the vulture's nest. I do wish that I had a smarmy, "oh, but don't you count Fiestawizard out just yet," type comment, but indeed I do lie by the nest of the bloody toothen vulture, with his combed over feather-top head and his sad eyes; so sad they are to be lusting over my body. To the vulture's later disgust, I am only there studying his nest and his ways. I seek to assault him with my investigations, and to steal his wisdom in devouring souls and finger roots, which are a special delicacy among his friends.
Soon, more postings will be available. To kick things off I'd like everyone to have a good old southern type internets search for "Jim Bob Druggar." He's the subject of a show on the Learning Channel about gigantic families - he's got 17 kids - all with names that begin with 'J'. Now, to be sure, it's not the "keepin' your wife pumpin' out baby matter," thing that gets me, or the fact that one poor girl had to be named Jinger. It's the fact that I've browsed past two of these shows in the same number of weeks - that is, people that create cult-like kiddy posses. It's not the focus of these documentaries, but as a sidenote, all families home school their children and follow a particular fundamentalist creed. The creed is an old one, that I independently ran across recenlty, that essentially states that any good woman should be pregnant as soon as possible, and should stay that way until it's no longer possible. You know, to produce soldiers of the cross and such. I don't care to provide links that further explain or prove this because
a) nobody that reads this will challenge it and
b) I don't care to link to certain sites that promote children birthing and
c) I don't really care
Also it's common Christian knowledge you blasphemous non-believing a-holes.
But, I do have a source for a lesser known Fundamentalist creed that I hope everyone can follow, if nothing else, for my own sake when I stop by your house later tomorrow evening.
The John Birch Society Evening Home Activities:
g)refreshments - served at the conclusion of the Home Evening, are especially appropriate if they are of the homemade variety (such as cookies, popcorn, ice cream, fudge or taffy) as the can be popped, baked, churned, cooked or pulled as a family.
I realize that a good portion of you have counted my ticker out... left me for dead near the vulture's nest. I do wish that I had a smarmy, "oh, but don't you count Fiestawizard out just yet," type comment, but indeed I do lie by the nest of the bloody toothen vulture, with his combed over feather-top head and his sad eyes; so sad they are to be lusting over my body. To the vulture's later disgust, I am only there studying his nest and his ways. I seek to assault him with my investigations, and to steal his wisdom in devouring souls and finger roots, which are a special delicacy among his friends.
Soon, more postings will be available. To kick things off I'd like everyone to have a good old southern type internets search for "Jim Bob Druggar." He's the subject of a show on the Learning Channel about gigantic families - he's got 17 kids - all with names that begin with 'J'. Now, to be sure, it's not the "keepin' your wife pumpin' out baby matter," thing that gets me, or the fact that one poor girl had to be named Jinger. It's the fact that I've browsed past two of these shows in the same number of weeks - that is, people that create cult-like kiddy posses. It's not the focus of these documentaries, but as a sidenote, all families home school their children and follow a particular fundamentalist creed. The creed is an old one, that I independently ran across recenlty, that essentially states that any good woman should be pregnant as soon as possible, and should stay that way until it's no longer possible. You know, to produce soldiers of the cross and such. I don't care to provide links that further explain or prove this because
a) nobody that reads this will challenge it and
b) I don't care to link to certain sites that promote children birthing and
c) I don't really care
Also it's common Christian knowledge you blasphemous non-believing a-holes.
But, I do have a source for a lesser known Fundamentalist creed that I hope everyone can follow, if nothing else, for my own sake when I stop by your house later tomorrow evening.
The John Birch Society Evening Home Activities:
g)refreshments - served at the conclusion of the Home Evening, are especially appropriate if they are of the homemade variety (such as cookies, popcorn, ice cream, fudge or taffy) as the can be popped, baked, churned, cooked or pulled as a family.
posted by fiestawizard at 12:11 AM
1 Comments:
i also won't point out the set-up inherent in such families. incest, people, i'm talking about incest. don't make me spell it out. "family fun-da-mentals" -- that's a protest song from the 60s that i don't need to completely sing all the lyrics to right now, but we all remember the part about "if i was a soldier of the lord/ my daughter would keep me stiff like a board"...
the age of aquarius!
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