Benjamin Gorhath the Shellfish Chef
The newest and best title of a poem I want you to write. Mine would go something like this:
Benjamin, take your knife oh sharp
Power up your arm under that tarp
Take a good clean swipe of grace
That's why they call you the ace
Watch out for the poison in my tummy
Talk down to me, treat me like a dummy
Mr. Gorhath, you've shown us the path
Unleash, unleash your horrible wrath!
Inspired by my trip today to the hobby shop, which happened to have many a leaden figure that I had the desire to buy and paint. Paints are expensive though, and so is watching all the people in the store discuss gaming theories and the like.
Lately I've been non-reactionary. Much of this has been a result of over exposure to things I should react to. The straw that broke my own back came from (where else?) network TV. On Dateline I just saw that ice in restaurants poses some type of danger. "Hopefully, ice won't fall into the wrong hands?" Wasn't this the tagline for the movie Ice Pirates? That movie was a farse NEARLY as equal to this report. I mean really, what else do I have to fear now that I've been made aware of ice? Next up: Are you washing your hands correctly? We'll demonstrate how after this!" Okay. The next report - Can your housecat eat your face off at night without you knowing? New reports suggest that you just might be wrong. Ice and house cats can't sue you or take away network funding. Other, real dangers can, and probably do. Just be happy that we're frightened into fearing the things that have the lowest probability of ever effecting us. The things that we should really fear are far too numerous, subversive, and so ugly that it's just better to let them sneak up on us. If we knew the truth, we'd resort to death by ice itself.
But it goes much further than these things for me, as you might have guessed. Everything is either presented to scare you or anger you. In my simple categorical system, the things that anger me present the most danger. I guess I usually react to these things, if anything. I've found, however, that's it's just much easier to say, "Oh really? Followed by deletion from the memory bank, a sip of mercury, and a return to myself. So, do your part, don't let the fear crush you - everyone's aware of it, but it seems that we make love to it now. Instead, opt for an old-fashioned boulder smashing. Enough said. Dispatch Benny Gorhath for the mystical slaying of your soul, just as he slices and dices a fresh oyster.
Benjamin, take your knife oh sharp
Power up your arm under that tarp
Take a good clean swipe of grace
That's why they call you the ace
Watch out for the poison in my tummy
Talk down to me, treat me like a dummy
Mr. Gorhath, you've shown us the path
Unleash, unleash your horrible wrath!
Inspired by my trip today to the hobby shop, which happened to have many a leaden figure that I had the desire to buy and paint. Paints are expensive though, and so is watching all the people in the store discuss gaming theories and the like.
Lately I've been non-reactionary. Much of this has been a result of over exposure to things I should react to. The straw that broke my own back came from (where else?) network TV. On Dateline I just saw that ice in restaurants poses some type of danger. "Hopefully, ice won't fall into the wrong hands?" Wasn't this the tagline for the movie Ice Pirates? That movie was a farse NEARLY as equal to this report. I mean really, what else do I have to fear now that I've been made aware of ice? Next up: Are you washing your hands correctly? We'll demonstrate how after this!" Okay. The next report - Can your housecat eat your face off at night without you knowing? New reports suggest that you just might be wrong. Ice and house cats can't sue you or take away network funding. Other, real dangers can, and probably do. Just be happy that we're frightened into fearing the things that have the lowest probability of ever effecting us. The things that we should really fear are far too numerous, subversive, and so ugly that it's just better to let them sneak up on us. If we knew the truth, we'd resort to death by ice itself.
But it goes much further than these things for me, as you might have guessed. Everything is either presented to scare you or anger you. In my simple categorical system, the things that anger me present the most danger. I guess I usually react to these things, if anything. I've found, however, that's it's just much easier to say, "Oh really? Followed by deletion from the memory bank, a sip of mercury, and a return to myself. So, do your part, don't let the fear crush you - everyone's aware of it, but it seems that we make love to it now. Instead, opt for an old-fashioned boulder smashing. Enough said. Dispatch Benny Gorhath for the mystical slaying of your soul, just as he slices and dices a fresh oyster.
posted by fiestawizard at 7:53 PM
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