Christ for sale
"I've been sold on Jesus ever since he made that movie last year. Did you see that movie? It was real good."
That's what the evangelists on the street were saying today, with accordian in hand. They also said this:
"I despise all civilian time. We deploy efficient hate with Japanese sword love. Is that a throbbing system problem?
I would suspect that the answer is yes. And I'm guessing that this all has to do with the fact that Bill Gates was in town last Thursday. "Surprise kids, I'm here." He said as he made a surprise appearance in a computer science class to talk about the monolpoly he plans to implement on them within the next few years. They were flattered to the max, and some managed to form erections (again, to their surprise). Bill Gates has become so used to dealing with exciting computer technology breakthroughs that he can't even get it up anymore. The most compelling (or depressing) part of this story is that Bill Gates' cat had passed away earlier in the day. Actually, it had more to do with the little fact that this appearance was all part of some new MTV show where celebrities make appearances at various places to knock the socks off of the onlookers.
With another MTV note, I've developed a paranoia of the show "Boiling Points." I continually convince myself that the current situation I'm in is some sort of prank. This can be beneficial however, as it makes me stay in hopes of getting the $100. In particular, while sitting in class, I felt sure that I was being told ridiculous old tales of trickery and debauchery. But, I was hell-bent on getting the cash reward (at the end of the semester), so I stayed in my seat. Another time I lost control of my bowels and I also mistook (in this case) this mishap for another amusing MTV practical joke. No money was received by me. Reality TV is nothing more than logic torture, full of empty promises, leaving my pants full of a gallon of you know what. What? I gotta go...
That's what the evangelists on the street were saying today, with accordian in hand. They also said this:
"I despise all civilian time. We deploy efficient hate with Japanese sword love. Is that a throbbing system problem?
I would suspect that the answer is yes. And I'm guessing that this all has to do with the fact that Bill Gates was in town last Thursday. "Surprise kids, I'm here." He said as he made a surprise appearance in a computer science class to talk about the monolpoly he plans to implement on them within the next few years. They were flattered to the max, and some managed to form erections (again, to their surprise). Bill Gates has become so used to dealing with exciting computer technology breakthroughs that he can't even get it up anymore. The most compelling (or depressing) part of this story is that Bill Gates' cat had passed away earlier in the day. Actually, it had more to do with the little fact that this appearance was all part of some new MTV show where celebrities make appearances at various places to knock the socks off of the onlookers.
With another MTV note, I've developed a paranoia of the show "Boiling Points." I continually convince myself that the current situation I'm in is some sort of prank. This can be beneficial however, as it makes me stay in hopes of getting the $100. In particular, while sitting in class, I felt sure that I was being told ridiculous old tales of trickery and debauchery. But, I was hell-bent on getting the cash reward (at the end of the semester), so I stayed in my seat. Another time I lost control of my bowels and I also mistook (in this case) this mishap for another amusing MTV practical joke. No money was received by me. Reality TV is nothing more than logic torture, full of empty promises, leaving my pants full of a gallon of you know what. What? I gotta go...
posted by fiestawizard at 4:27 PM
1 Comments:
Here, let me try to get you to reach the boiling point: "Your eyes are bleeding, dude! Just look in a mirror!" Did it work?
Bill Gates isn't so bad. Windows, on the other hand, is pretty shitty. On the other hand, I had to sit and watch the other day while someone was trying to retrieve a document from her PowerMac for me. "Come on, dock, appear!" To no avail. The dock was hidden. She had to go through several steps, none of which would be logical to one unskilled in the illogic of hidden nested menus, such as my wife. The document, when it was found, was not easily printed. So I didn't feel so bad, since my computer has been working lately.
P.S. -- I can't get you Office 2003, because I guess I can only get one copy from school. I'll try to find another copy on the internets. Mind you, new version coming out next year will be totally different. But if you're not paying, who cares, right?
Eat my piracy, Gates!
And yes, that IS a throbbing system problem, but never again will it be so engaging.
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