Test it out, feel the grace of its energy

So, not much of significance to report these days (the testing program will begin tomorrow). That information, in itself was of little significance. From now on, no insignificant news will be reported, not even the existence of such news. Are we clear on that? Okay.

Today I had a long conversation with my dog about old records, finances, and selected philisophical topics (like the one above, which I had with myself just now). I also insulted her tumor. She doesn't care so much as I feed her. So... ummm... yeah, I got in a meditative state earlier this afternoon by looking at the texture on the wall in a particular light. That was pretty good for me I think, as it gave my mind a little extra time-out to catch up with the extra capsules I took this morning. Now, conversations with animals or inanimate objects are one thing, but reporting them via sort of media is absolute absurdity. From now on, there will be no more of this shit. Understood? Good.

I made somebody watch Gummo recently. Nobody these days has an appreciation for reality, dark as it may be. I understand. I totally forgot about all of the cat torture and murder. Now, I say reality, but of course we all have an image of "reality" in television. Gummo is more of a fictional, monotone, depiction of reality, that couldn't have been produced much better in my mind. Yeah, it doesn't have a plot, yeah, it could be argued that it focuses on disorder and negative actions and qualities. Of course, those are all more or less qualitative judgements made by the viewer, and for me, inserting a linear plot and balloons and monkey in clown suits actually is much more upsetting to me. Maybe I just like mindless chaos (which makes me think, so really it's not mindless now is it). I'll tell you what's mindless- reality shows on TV. Celebrity Skating, American Idol, Celebrity Adultress (next season), America's next top Asian, etc., etc. American Idol for example - hey, I have an idea, let's perpetuate people's beliefs of who geeks are! Okay, I'm actually all for that. Celebrity Skating though? Christ. He said that the apocaplyse will come alright. That's it! No more discussion of reality depictions or actual reality will be discussed here. No more! Do I have to repeat myself?! No? Good.

So, we're now left with... nothing. Nothing shall ever be reported here again. You can post pictures, but they can't have an intended meaning. All thought work will be done at home in the confines of your tiny, dark, damp room with your cat. I think we're clear on that, right? Good.

Sports Hero = Me

I had a traumatic childhood event once in which, as a first-grader, I passed the basketball to a kid from my own class who happened to be on the other team, just because I knew him and thought he was, you know, my friend.

Although actually he wasn't my friend; he was just capitalizing on my ignorance of basketball when he said, "Hey, pass it to me!"

So I always thought that this moment of fucking up was a defining one, something that no other person would do -- at least not anyone who was actually "Good" at sports.

But on the TV sports recap tonight, I noticed that the Timberwolves were playing the, um, whoever, and what happened was, one of the Timberwolves, let's call him "Not Kevin Garnett" made an excellent incredible shot. Non-KG, feeling proud, then went over to "high five" this guy Wally Szczerbiak... only to be dissed by Wally, because you know what? Wally Szczerbiak USED TO BE Non-KG's friend and teammate, but is NOW on the other team, the rival team!

Oooooh! Too bad! High five "denied" to Non-KG! Brick!

So, you see, even awesome pro sports guys who aren't Kevin Garnett can do stupid things that a 1st grader who doesn't know the basic rules of basketball would do.*

This might also include pooping on the slide during recess.


*The guy who attempted the high-five might, in fact, have been Kevin Garnett. I have no idea, as I was barely paying attention.

To build a fire...

I built a fire today. Then I ignited the fire with some gas and a magnifying glass. Let me explain, or rather, let me give you the evidence, then I will explain:


Ryan G.,

Please see Bill K. in regard to the informational packets you requested and to go over a few details of this ambitious undertaking (a lot of people are excited)! If you decided on something other than the blue and yellow handbooks that we discussed, please let Bill know about this and he can make some changes. Also, I'm not sure if this applies to you or not, but we need those no.2 pencils back from last semester's TA evals (sharpened if possible). Some got broken and others were sent back to the manufacturer for several very complicated reasons that you wouldn't understand.

Thanks,

R.P.


I put this in a mailbox, you see, to get the fire started. It's a response to a trick I perceived to be played against me (I am real paranoid, and really anything, including but not limited to smiling at me is perceived as a trick). This guy wrote me a message on the whiteboard I use during class. The message made me feel used, abused, distraught, and destroyed. Well, it at least was slightly distracting. Now , because he made a poor choice, he won't know what the fuck to do. There is indeed a guy named Bill K., but I left this up to Ryan as to who he should designate. The moral of the story is not, "don't fuck around with me," rather it's, "please fuck with me so I can spend a little of my valuable time amusing myself." Now, to cap this off, I should have put something in Bill K.'s mailbox that said, "Hi Bill, I need to come to talk to you about the informational pamphlets. I'll probably stop in later today or Monday, and I love your style and wife's ass-- Ryan" My suggestion for you is to also use the local mailbox system (at your place of employment) in this manner. Set up a few harmless, unfruitful meetings between individuals. To see the results ask this question, "Did you pick up your information from Bill yet? I did."

The endless nonsense reveals your truth

"As I attempted to escape the suffocating nerve agents of the main facility, I realized that cutting the last two wires was my only chance. This sort of action, afterall, is what had caused the agents to be dispersed in the first place. A system can take on the awareness of a creature, of course, if one connects (with the wires) the proper computational systems and programs and the like. It responds with a sort of ambitious, punitive, (and humorous, to me) anger. Only a guy like MacGyver could get you and your friends out of this mess, considering all of the escape passages were indeed locked down."

This is actually a segment of a dream I had. It seems that in my dreams, I depend on MacGyver quite a lot. Probably too much (he's only human, born to make mistakes). Seriously, that's who I planned to call in my dream, had it not been for the slow destruction of my nervous system on my march to the grave. Then later, after escaping:

"Sleeping in the attic loft lacked the proper comforts, some said. Not myself, as it had carpet, a nice lamp and plenty of carpet. Windows too. Speaking of that lamp I had briefly noticed a carving in it's wooden mast. A swastika with the traditional family emblem (of Stacy's family). I said my piece and I knew right then and there. Sure, Stacy's brother's dad had been a white supremacist, and there were different dads in the family. Troy got into that stuff and had also taken some wood carving classes. Troy never realized that carvings could be made from simple blocks of wood. Instead he continued to carve up table tops, walls, tennis racquets, and utility poles. Every time Troy thought of a new hate crime or carving he executed said thought while thinking of Steve Guttenberg, the actor. Are motives the same as intentions? I took off shortly thereafter to pursue some different things. Swastikas, attics, and vandalism weren't for me."

Subtle Conspiring?

This is an email that a fellow TAA organizer got in an apparent (?) attempt to insult him... I guess:



Author: Spielman, Emily Jo, 1943-

Title: Alienation and dissatisfaction : some methodological and
theoretical considerations suggested by a study of TA's
/ by Emily J. Spielman.

Publisher: 1969.

Description: 77 leaves ; 29 cm.

Notes: Thesis (M.S.)--University of Wisconsin--Madison, 1969.
Includes bibliography.

OCLC: (OCoLC)ocm53791970

Subjects: Teachers' assistants.
Social isolation.
Dissertations, Academic Sociology.

Location: Memorial Library UW Madison Theses Basement North

Catalog: UW Madison

Call Number: AWO S7494 E533

Status: Ask library staff for current status

================================================================================



University of Wisconsin - Madison Libraries
http://www.library.wisc.edu/
madcatcontact-l@library.wisc.edu



Strange. To point a pinky finger, there's this right-wing movement here that stands on a small quicksand-like island. They continually try to prove their relentless, "strong-armed" tactics by creating anti-flag burning hysteria. Usually their argument includes something about being in the minority and not being able to voice an opinion within a stifling culture of biased professors and liberal wackos as evident by this:


Do you have a professor who just can't stop talking about President
Bush, about the war in Iraq, about the Republican Party, or
any other ideological issue that has nothing to do
with the class subject matter? It doesn't matter whether this is a
past class, or your class for this coming winter quarter.


If you help UCLAProfs.com expose the professor, we'll pay you for
your work.


To see if we need information on the professors you've already taken, or will be taking this winter quarter, call 310-210-6735, or email bruinalumni (AT) bruinalumni.com today, and you could be paid tomorrow.


I called, and I suggest doing the same, to find out where the money is coming from if possible.

At the core of all of this is Jesus, whom once said, "Do not insult your leader. Also, create the best environment for job creation." At least that's what the right would tell you. I just read it in the paper. That's what Republicans are doing; creating a good job creation environment. I guess that's where the rift in our relationship lies. The question is, "what's the most effective way to create this job environment you speak of?" It certainly must have something to do with giving monies to corporations then allowing them essentially use that money to send labor to "competing labor markets." Of course, it's always nice to divert attention by debating about intelligent design, bomb threats, and vaginal unpleasantries. Well now, we can get into these things more later, upon your request for discussion.

By the way, UFOID was really wondering about B.O.R.T.'s reaction to his gift of music. Please respond to this by explaining your exact facial expression.

Comedic Nightmares, Inc.

A piece of trivial trivia for you: did you know that the same people in Reno 911 (the hit Comedy Central Cops Satire) are the same people involved in MTV's The State? Well, they are. I just learned that yesterday after renting the video vault version of The State. If you forgot what the show had to offer, check this out. It's a fairly lame site, but gives you the requested information in a straight-forward manner, which is okay sometimes, but is just okey other times. You know what I mean. My nostalgically favorite skit was "Doug and his Dad," which features a teenage kid named Doug always contesting his own father's coolness with his drug use and such. I might have just liked it because the kid's name is Doug, and that's funny?

So now that you have your trivia for the day, I'm sure you're saying, "oh, could you make me a casserole too?" Sure. Sure I will. I always maintain that one must use liberally the skills that he/she has been given, and that's just what I'll do. But no, I'm not telling you exactly what type I plan to make, or even if I will use an established recipe. That's right, I might just throw some choice ingredients together and bake them at 350 for around 2 hours, or until the ingredients are tender and delicious. I won't burn them, trust me.

Right now I'm going to listen to Rush: Grace Under Pressure, then some Viking metal, then Rush: Power Windows, all while learning about electro-attacking mutants and machinery. By the way, I recently read the new Kurt Vonnegut book, and it's highly recommended, if only because it only takes about 3 hours to read. Also, I recommend making a pyramid-style temple structure (with room inside), as I have discovered that I am now able to communicate in this manner. That is, from my pyramid to yours and vice-versa using thoughts only. So simple, yet so misunderstood.

Deadly Towers Speed Run

That title might not make sense, until you visit the SpeedDemos Archives, a website featuring crazy geeks who have perfected their skills on lots of games, new and old alike. I learned a few things, like how in Castlevania you can skip entire stretches of levels by letting yourself get hit by a bat; or how in Metroid you don't actually have to fight Ridley, because you can bomb yourself across the gap to the final area right after you beat Kraid. These aren't the kind of tips you'll get from the Donn and Jim and their U.S. Video Game Team video series.

Twisting of the Knee of Fate

Yes, once again, in a dangerous twist of fate, I have been given employment (as the reader of this site already knows). Now I will spend a bunch of money on women and booze to show that I just don't fuckin' care. I will send all of the donations back soon... and the website will be safe for another 6 months at least. Your points in the last commentary were quite well taken. I will be waiting for various people to fuck up in life, then return to a more creative and freesytle life. I can hardly wait to fly planes and pet flamingos with them. However, I don't live in Florida, and this isn't Miami Vice, so I'm not sure the flamingos completely agree with my ideas. By the way, did you read the comments from a couple of posts ago? There was a post that appeared to be of the spam nature, but turned out to go to a real(?) blog for some really boring park ranger type guy with a lot of propaganda for Juicy Fruit gum (if I'm not mistaken, a good meal for you during eigth grade). Check it out, I don't get it.

Has anyone seen the movie Broken Flowers with Bill Murray? It's sort of like Lost in Translation, except good. I saw it at the cheap theater, so it was worth all $2.50. Check that out as well.

Next topic for posting: You are such a loser, and I am too (by blood connection). Goodbye for now.

A Magnetic Wind Vortex Near the Fort of Solitude

There's no such thing, but the name definitely got you interested (there is, of course, a fortress of solitude), just like healing methods, fear and other amazing anomalies caused by magnetic fields.

I've been making small amounts of progress lately I feel. Except right now, at 12:35 am. This post started at 8 pm. You'll be happy to know that my being sidetracked has contributed to new output. It will now be posted to the main site. Enjoy it while it lasts. The question to be asked is, "Am I more productive than I was last year?" Probably not is the answer, but this year I feel I have more of an excuse. The excuse: most of the people I know are noticeably aged. Of course I don't mean older in appearance with cold tired hands and wrinkly foreheads, but in the "time to be boring" sense. With the exception of making some commercials at the TV station, which I could have done for many hours and was ultimately a great creative outlet, I have little inspiration. Yes, it's true that most of everything I do is for my own amusement, but I only now realized that I need some other sources to feed off of. Anyway, we weren't put on this planet to sit around and watch TV and talk about our jobs and get things delivered to us... I hope. That's what I heard in church anyway. Get outside and fuck around a bit and shoot the breeze with a gas station attendant. I assure you, it can be quite rewarding. Explore, ask some questions, throw some rocks, play chess with the mysterious stranger, take a note or two.

I got some new equipment to transfer video. The shit sucks. I have to take it back. That's too bad, as this new equipment was integral to my newest scheme. I have video of a neon cross, which will soon, with some luck become the subject of the next religious exposè. Good luck to me.

Okay, so now I will post. Visit the site, which may be gone soon if I don't get a job. Remind me to download the whole fucker and keep it under lock and key. Fate is a mean bitch.