Puzzling

This is, I believe, made in Japan. It's called GROW-RPG, and its mysteries are yours for the probing. It took me about 2 hours of fumbling to solve it. These 2 hours were not continuous, mind you; lest it be said that I have no life. I did, in fact, interrupt it to eat dinner last night, sleep, do some work this morning, and eat lunch.

My cryptic hints, given in early-NES instruction manual format, are below, to be used only if needed ... should you decide to take the challenge:

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Hint 1: For Hero's assistance, you must help each Grow to its maximum potential.
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Hint 2: Grow correctly to determine what is needed for each.
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Hint 3: The anger of a Devil should not be quelled too quickly.

Hint 4: Still Stuck? Call one of the EyeMaze counselors, available Thursdays from 19:00 to 20:00 Pacific Standard Time.

gave in, new post

Check it out, in the F.Wizard zone. Leave me alone. Cult of the Millenium.

Iron Fucking Maiden

Before I talk about the upcoming show, I want to mention a few notable items from my ongoing investigations:
1) I've ran into a guy several times who's walking really fast by using great arm action. Erratic arm action, I should say. His arms are about 6 feet long, and he's a silly tall drink of water. Also he moves his head to-and-fro when he walks. My first inclination is to think he's some type of dreamer, or a half-wit, or a competition walker. On the contrary he said to me, "Hey my man, what's the dog's name?" As he sped by. I said "Gem," and he said, "Gemmy." He's got a backpack and speed, be on the lookout.
2) I was walking in a neighborhood near my house when I heard some synth beats playing. It sounded like general Nintendo music, which I appreciate. I sometimes want a similar soundtrack to coincide with my investigations. As the sound became nearer, I spotted the Downs Syndrome lad as he laughed maniacally. He also had a ghetto-blaster. That was some loop fella, some loop.
3) Shortly after the previous situation occurred, I was simply minding my own business as usual as I passed by several houses. I had taken my safety for granted. That's when we ran into trouble: smooth, soft-consistency poop had been trailed down the sidwalk. My own observations led me to conclude that it was human excrement. My dog may have ate some, but I will pretend she didn't. "Can't be proven," she told me.

That's all, but in other news I am going to the concerto where Maiden will be playing songs from Powerslave, Piece of Mind, and Seventh Son of a Seventh Son album. Other bands will also be playing light to heavy tunes.

I will not post the new data yet to the main page, so you might as well quit begging. The items to enjoy today are: strawberry milk, hepatitis, handball, potato burrito at Taco John's for lunch.
The items to despise today are: tooth creams, spanish rice with you burrito (they don't have that there), people named Merton (different spellings apply)

Ramping up the Ramblings

Time out - have you been suffering from difficult overtime matches and under-developed strength? Well, I don't really care all that much. It's been awhile, and I have a few new items to discuss. First of all (and foremost), I do in fact have updates to post to the main site, but I don't really feel any pressure to do so. Other news is more fun right now: Steve Harris, the ultimate bad-boy bassist of Iron Fucking Maiden, apparently has a daughter. Apparently, said daughter is no different than other celebrity type daughter - at least not in England. It turns out she's putting out her own album soon. Now, because I'm fairly naivè and self-convincing, I was certain that she played a mean bass and had an accompanying operatic singer to assist her. Well, before I say more, you decide for yourself: HERE

The other news is that I saw this painted on the walking bridge near my house ">/bush<". The brackets, of course were actually facing the other way, just as they do in html code. Clever I thought, clever. It can mean so many things. "The end of a command," more specifically. That's all.

Didn't Spinal Tap write a song about this sort of thing?

From a published report that I dare not link to:

"The dead man was identified as a 45-year-old Seattle resident. According to the King County Medical Examiner's Office, he died of acute peritonitis due to perforation of the colon. The man's death is not being investigated because it did not result from a crime, Urquhart said.

"The Seattle man's relatives said yesterday they never suspected he was involved in bestiality. They said they were surprised when they learned he had purchased a Thoroughbred stallion earlier this year. The man told his relatives he boarded the animal with some friends in Enumclaw."


Yes, and it turns out that those "friends in Enumclaw" owned & operated a little something that we might call affectionately a "Sex Farm."

So, if your relative ever just up and buys a stallion, take note of it and consider buying that relative an "internal colonic shield device."

The banana tree discretely recognized the man

The man came to realize in his comparison of the two bananas that the latter would have to be given to the others in a short case of cooperation. It was the least he could do. The elevator that held the the giant golden man statue proceeded to climb the tower. High atop the tower, in a the cave used to obtain energy, items and prophecies, the invisible leader appeared momentarily out of the beams of light. That was great. The brown bag of goods was given to the giant's children. It was a grab bag. They went back home only to be seen in the spectral watch of the leader dealing with the wind of agression in their small shack as they held on to mom. Mom had a whip held behind her back that may be used later. That scene was in grayscale. The bag contained a "super-ball," two nickels, and a rhyme box. Also the leader laughed that they had no use for those items... just yet.

Helping B.O.R.T. see the truth since 1987. I have a program this weekend. Inquire if you want me to tell you... anyone. Please, for god's sakes, just ask. Please.

The fleecing of you...

“Why don’t we all step back and lower the rhetoric." The words Norm Coleman himself, governor extraordinaire. In reference to the CIA agent identity crisis.

That's right folks, lower the rhetoric. I'm not one to be skilled in the art of using refined political language to sound good, but I do think that this one ranks up there with some of the best shit ever. Now, rhetoric, defined as the use of language to write or speak effectively, should definitely be "lowered," with this I agree. I mean, why not? Why not put things in plain terms for the common folk. Norm Coleman's words definitely don't contradict this, that's for sure. He's not using words he doesn't understand to try to persuade people. Or is he? Well, one thing's for sure: Minnesota is lucky to have someone as well-rounded in intelligence as this man. Soon he will suggest lowering other things such as funding schools and not carrying concealed weapons. Oh, wait, shit, I had a mind attack... I think he already did that. And yes, I did have a mind attack. We are constantly reminded to stay stupid, so I'm going to go sniff acetone and drink varnish now.

Against the wall with no expression

There I stood, against the wall of foils, stone-faced. You either go to Denny's to get food poisoning or get into a fight. I know I filled my breadbasket more often than not. Several years ago, for example, the local health department entered and administered cold milk and puzzles to the children. They were exhausted and malnourished. Then there was the guy with the suspected "rock" in his leftern pocket. The crack pipe was later found in the bathroom sink. Hashbrowns have an affinity for biological material. Another time, in the parking lot, a rotted ham core was used as an instrument of blunt trauma on an elderly man. An ant problem also existed near the west edge of the parking lot near the sidewalk that sent one overweight local to the emergency ward with inflictions of the ankle.

That was from the news today. Now I have a shitload of work to do for this class I'm taking. It's beginning to kill my soul (thanks for the Shield of Thadiux B.O.R.T., it protects the soul just as you promised). The good news is that I'm not paying for the class, but my professor said he could give me credit next semester for free. That's good, but it means I have to try my "best" now, just like my mom told me too. And that's really all one can ask for right? Needless to say, my other projections and projects have been currently on hold, so don't shout in my general direction just yet. If only other people would contribute kindly.... (not aimed towards the readers of this site, neccessarily). Good day for now.

Fuckin' Milonakis

Yes, he is 29 years old. Apparently he's got some condition. Within this context, the show might be a little bit funnier- only because he's a network administrator at an accounting firm and he's trapped inside a 12-year-old's body. HA! However, that makes his subpar humor even more subpar, considering he's had 20 years to work on it, instead of the 2 or 3 that I assumed. Check this out for more information.

World War III,The Prelude, continues -- Attacks on Londoen

Today there was a wee series of explosions in London, as you all well know. [NB: don't f0llow this next link if you're paranoid.] The message forum site that claimed responsibility, "Secret Group of al Qaeda's Jihad in Europe," is in Arabic, and also encrypted (according to the certificate it tried to send my computer, at least).

Since we as a nation do not understand Arabic and/or encryption, the best thing to do, per our Overseers, will likely be to again chip away at as many basic human rights as possible. "The war on terror continues," per the Prez's official statement after the attack today.

Have any of the Overseers considered that such chipping action is precisely what these Holy War actors want? Guess not.

In other news... say, does it smell like sulfur outside today, or what? [NB: conservative-leaning musings after that link]

Also... is this Organic Bran-Fiber Cereal I'm eating poisoned with sarin nerve gas? Or is it supposed to make my muscles rigid and my mouth drool uncontrollably while I lose control of my bowels?

Finally... isn't that guy across the street from me a Muslamic Jewist? If so, he must be stopped before greater evil is caused. I'll call the SS immediately. They have Total Information Awareness, you know. [thanks to Memory Hole, an excellent site that keeps records of things on the web that have been removed due to people not wanting them to be seen... the latter courtesy of DARPA and the DOD, who took that page down after much public outcry]

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My other issue is Minnesota, again. This story will now be overshadowed by the bombings, which is maybe for the best, but it's still that ol' MN magic at work. Although, technically, this dude was living in Fargo until a few days prior to his horror-movie style killing/raping spree. And blogging from Fargo, too, I might add.

On the other-other hand, it was a MN judge who let him out on bail recently who now "doesn't remember" whether she had been told he was a high-risk sex offender.

Overall, I continue to be disillusioned with a state I once loved. Minnesota, you're like a moody adolescent, and as one of your family members, I hate to say this... it hurts me more than it hurts you... but "I don't even know who you are anymore!"

Now go to your room and think about what you've done.

Latest runnings and rampings

I am currently watching the Twilight Zone 4th of July bash. This one is starring Chuck Bronson, which delights me beyond belief. So, happy 4th of July to everyone. Burn your flags in protest if you wish, while you still can, because it just so happens that once again an amendment has been proposed to ban such activity. It is sponsored in part by North Dakota's own Kent Conrad, whose cousin I met on a walk by the lakeshore a couple of weeks ago. Strange, but true. I've met Kent Conrad too, and I wouldn't have shaken his hand so softly and tickled his palm if I knew he was an anti-flag burner.

"I exercise the Bill of Rights. To the republic for which you stand. Burn the flag. If there is any freedom left. Burn the Flag," --- The Fifth Sun

Burn the fucking flag folks. Practice true patriotism. You know, the kind that doesn't actually like to see your "liberty and freedom" go up in smoke. Do it for your dad.

In other news, I've posted new data here. Religious Exposè part III to be precise. It's a good one, so I highly reccomend taking the time to read and view.

In yet more news, I am posting more things today... maybe. I have the material, someone just needs to say, "transfer now." Without those words, nothing will happen. I've also wasted a good portion of my time trying to write a script or program that will take numbers from rows and arrange them in columns. I failed, but as it turns out someone more talented than I had the secret code all along. I took it. Now my time will be better spent sitting around and watching high-volume cable. Later today on the Surgery Channel they're going to show laser colon cleaning. I can't fucking wait.